Welcome, Liberal Educators of the Class of 2012!  In order to ensure that the adults of tomorrow are properly indocrinated in the ways of all things liberal, including gay-homo-sex, we’ve devised the following curriculum to be followed in all schools from now on.  Please familiarize yourself with them as you will be required to follow this agenda rigidly. 

  • Intimacy 101: Your Lips, Your Tongue, and You;
  • Home Economics: Intro to Piercing;
  • Greek and Pagan History;
  • An Overview of Sexual Abuse in the Roman Catholic Church (this takes 2 semesters);
  • Auto Mechanics will only be taught to the girls from now on;
  • Physical Education will, of course, be broken up into subcategories: Physical Fitness, Proper Dildo Insertion, Anal Cleansing, Pleasuring Your Partner, Proper Douche Use, When Is Fisting Bad?, What Is A Ball-Gag?, and, of course, Orgy 202. 
  • As teachers, you’ll be required to purchase all of your own supplies, which can be found at various shops online.  Don’t forget to buy plenty of batteries as well.  Remember, the last thing a student needs is to end up in the stirrups and the batteries die!  That’s no way to teach our Agenda! 
  • Of course, any mention of Religion other than in proscribed classes will result in detention (first offense), suspension (second offense), or expulsion (final offense).  The Book of Mormon will be burned on sight.
You’ll find all of these in the latest edition of the Gay&Lesbian Agenda handbook! 
Hey, if we’re going to be accused of indoctrination anyway . . . ~snark~

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