Murphy said ‘Hang on, I have an idea.
He went next door to the butcher’s shop and came out with one large sausage.
Shamus said, “Are you crazy? Now we don’t have any money left at all!!”
To which Murphy replied, “Don’t worry, just follow me.”
They proceeded to go into the pub, where Murphy ordered two pints of Guinness and two glasses of Jamieson Whisky.
Shamus said to Murphy, “Now you’ve lost it. Do you know how much trouble we’re going to be in? We haven’t got any money!”
Murphy replied with a smile, “Don’t worry, just enjoy yer drinks. I’ve got a plan.
They downed their drinks, and Murphy said, “Ok, I’ll stick the sausage through my zipper and you go on your knees and put it in your mouth.”
The bartender, of course, noticed them and promptly threw them out of the pub. The men, seeing that they’ve got something here, continued this, going to pub after pub getting more and more drunk for free.
At the tenth pub Shamus said, “Murphy, I don’t think I can do any more of this. I’m drunk and my knees are killing me.”
To which Shamus replied, “How do you think I feel? I lost the sausage after the third pub!”